WELCOME TO AIR INDIA..........> WELCOME TO AIR INDIA ! > > "Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain MUTHU. > Welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board of Air India . We > apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad weather > and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery. > > This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we > will end up somewhere in India . And, if luck is in our favor, we may > even be landing on your village! > > Air India has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards > are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us! > > It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our > passengers have reached their destination only... > > If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange > to turn them off! > > To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable, we serve > complimentary DHARU and Wada pavw....toseii...mutu mayamm.. > > For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help > you find out if there really is a God..out there..! > > We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as > we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs, > we will be flying right next to Emirates Airline, where their movie > will be visible from the right side of the cabin window. > > There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the > cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow > down! > > In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible > for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do let us know. > > Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark! > > Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and > fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt, > kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you > who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess > who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase." > > ENJOY AIR INDIA !
